Health Isn't a Flex - It's a Fight

"You never know how strong you are, until being strong is your only choice."  ― Bob Marley

I was 14 years-old and I was doing push-ups in the ICU.

No, this isn’t some weird flex about my origins as a personal trainer. This is a simple memory of a time well before I knew the power of movement had over improving not just your health, but your mind as well.

So, back to the push-ups, and more importantly, why I was even in the ICU.

Just days prior, my cancer prognosis had increased what stage I was in with my then recently discovered Hodgkin's Lymphoma. After scans revealed a large mass sitting on top of my lungs and heart, my doctors realized - luckily - I had been a stomach sleeper as it was large enough to stop my heart or suffocate me in my sleep. New fear unlocked.

Taking no chances, they admitted me to the ICU until I had my first Chemo treatment to reduce it to a size less…lethal.

Of course, while I’m sitting there with endless tv shows, books, and crocheting (my grandmother taught me at the age of 8) I was getting stir crazy. After all, I actually felt perfectly fine, aside from the occasional barking cough.

But I was starting to feel off.

I needed to move! And when I did, I felt significantly better.

This memory came to mind today as I was thinking about all the great coaches I follow that say matter of factly, “Fuck motivation, you just need discipline!”

Even I’ve said the same thing. But as I study more on mindset and how to help clients shift theirs, I realize that messaging is pretty off.

Because discipline seems to come from a place of motivation. It’s just deeper, more intrinsic. It’s a growth mindset. 

Take for example New Year’s Resolutions, where I think the idea of motivation gets looked down upon. The idea of a whole new and improved you takes hold and you’re so excited to start unwrapping that person! You see that person so clearly!

You get the gym membership - or figure out where the hell your gym card went from 7 months ago, maybe get some new kicks, buy some earbuds, and we are off to the races! 

However, the races were actually just a short sprint. The motivation was externally motivated.

Crap. 

By February, your fixed mindset and lack of intrinsic motivation - what fuels discipline - has you laughing at memes that say, “No good story starts with a salad.” Now that superficial motivation on January 1st is replaced by a misplaced superiority over those who are on the health track. 

You think how they are really just missing out on the fun things in life.

You decide that you’re just not that person.

However, your body disagrees. 

You feel it rejects your decisions by feeling off, like I did in the ICU. 

It tells you you’re not well when you feel bloated, the back aches or the knees hurt, and the sleep sucks.

Your blood work speaks volumes as your doctor tells you it's “normal” to have increasing cholesterol at your age… or whatever other “age related” symptom you have. *Hint: It's “normal” only because there are more people than not ignoring their bodies as they age. 

This is where I’d like to get all sciency about what is going on biologically, but I’ll cut to the chase: 

Your body wants to heal. It wants to be healthy. And it’s doing everything it can to get there, but the fallout of its struggle to fix the damage is a war-torn body.

Fucking dark, I know.

I’ve been that casualty. And I probably have more reason than most to have just let go and accepted my fate as an autoimmune patient with a history of cancer.

War-torn from environment, nutrition, and genetic expression all before I could even get my driver’s license.

Our discipline, those of us who fall into being “health nuts” may have started with a motivating moment - like a wake up call or seeing someone we’d want to be like. Hell, could’ve even started during the January 1st craze, but then carried on through a discipline that’s rooted in determination. Growth began to take hold at some point.

Motivation shifts to things like to not be in pain, to continue to improve ourselves, or even just to not be reliant on a medical system that treats symptoms rather than removing dis-ease.

That can be a hard point to reach. To master the discipline to sit in that space, and pull from the motivation that feeling good in your body, no matter the age, is worth putting in the effort (i.e., gym, walking, regular sleep schedule, nutrition) and trading out temporary satisfaction (e.g., crushing the full bag of cheetos, chased down by a beer, and netflix marathons every night or weekend).

Being healthy is simple, but hard. An effort has to be made.

Discipline is rooted in intrinsic motivation.

Intrinsic motivation comes from developing a growth mindset.

A growth mindset has to be nurtured beyond your self-doubts around your capabilities to pursue health and feel good in your skin.

Personally, if you know my story, or are getting to know it, then you can see where my own intrinsic motivation to be the healthiest version of myself comes from.

Yet my strive to become the best damn coach doesn’t come from my surviving cancer, but rather watching my father succumb to his a couple years back. True Grit Fitness was born from a tragedy that I can only hope I can help others avoid.

There are so many things we can do to avoid chronic illnesses and cancer once we break through the noise of a broken system surrounding health and wellness.

You just have to be willing to listen to those of us raising our voice, and the guidance we’re giving you.

If this resonates with you, check out our coaching at True Grit Fitness